the simple life

Your Dream Might Overshadow Your Purpose

/ inkspeare

Dreaming starts early in life. It starts wishing for favorite toys and things we want as kids, and it continues to evolve to more complex desires, material, such as a car or a house, and even nonmaterial things such as success, financial freedom, and so on. I don’t think that there is anyone on this planet that does not have at least one dream.

For many of us, our most precious dreams manifest late in life; other people never get to realize their dream, and others struggle all their life in pursuit of something that never materializes. Other people realize what they thought was their dream, was actually not after achieving it. Sometimes, our dreams can overshadow a main purpose. That is, we are so focused on achieving what we want (or think we want) that we forget the main objective, which might be different from our dream. For example, let’s say that I run a shop to raise money for a cause. The main purpose is to make as much money to benefit such cause. However, I had a dream of owning an upscale boutique, and the shop is fulfilling a small part of that dream, emotionally that is. Ideally, and keeping to the main purpose of raising money for a cause, I would price items at various price points to attract as many people as possible in order to achieve my main purpose. However, my own dream gets in the way and overshadows my main objective. I start thinking of more upscale items that will attract specific buyers, and not the number of customers I need coming through the doors in order to achieve the main purpose. In this example, my personal dream overshadowed my main objective which was to raise as much money as possible for a cause. Another example, it is also the case of parents who live their dream through their kids. The kid’s own dreams take second place and so does parenting. These are just two examples but this can apply to many things in life, including writing.

We are emotional beings and sometimes, the strings of the heart play a louder melody, thus deafening us to our main objective. To dream is in our nature, and so is to strive and achieve a purpose/objective. Sometimes, those two don’t necessarily align well. When in doubt, go back to the main objective.

We can think that the moon is a slice of cheese, or we can see it for what it is. (Photo by M.A.D.)

You Are Not What You Own

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I took this picture in 2012 or so; it still speaks to me. (Photo by M.A.D.)

The minute we open our eyes to receive a brand-new day we are bombarded by advertising, whether on the news, the items we already own, and it continues throughout our day. Whether we realize it or not, we are being sold something (material or other) all the time. It is no wonder that we feel the need to accumulate more things and think that we actually need most of these items to live. We have learned to build status, a persona, around these things, and many times, we confuse who we are with the number of things or status we possess. Society builds itself around opportunities to have and have more, as well as the perception other people have of what we own. If we don’t own, we might not feel at par with the rest and we feel diminished. Why is that?

We have placed more value on our material possessions than on the God-given gifts and abilities we have; we have become our possessions and to have less than what society expects of us is unacceptable for many people. If we don’t follow the herd, we feel marginalized because sometimes, we are. The day we open our eyes and wake up, that is the day that we realize that we are more than what we own, and that our human value surpasses all of that. We understand that any material items in our lives are a blessing and not an extension of our Self. Then, we become grateful and free, not controlled or cursed by our material possessions or even the emotional weight that these put on us. Gratefulness opens the door for generosity and sharing. The true essence of who we are starts to emerge.

Unexpected Blessings

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Recently, a very special friend who I have not seen in 8 years came to visit. I was so happy, full of joy to have seen my good friend again. It was an unexpected blessing. Life is full of unexpected blessings. Those usually appear when you need them most. Blessings that refresh your spirit and bring joy to your soul. Sometimes, those blessings are present and not that obvious because we are not attuned to these. In a fast-paced environment, life sometimes seems to go by quickly and we plug in to the speed of life, unaware of the blessings along the way.

Ever seen something “new” on a road/place you have been countless of times? Later, you find out that it has been there always, and you were not aware of it because you were not attuned to its presence. Many times, unexpected blessings have been there all along, but we failed to see them. Sometimes, we realize that what we wanted so much is what we already had but failed to see.

Freedom, Material Detachment

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At the start of a new year, we are bombarded with commercials about weight loss, organizational systems, and anything that will sell a fresh start. Our society has embraced consumerism and “the more and bigger the better” modus operandi while taken it to new levels. This is a topic close to my heart and I should start by saying that I am not a minimalist, although I can appreciate all its benefits.

Throughout the years, I have learned to live with less and continue to do so. Each day is an opportunity to have one less material thing in my life. I still find beauty in things and certainly have my favorites. However, I have pared down quite a lot since I started my journey on living a simpler life. I honestly don’t see myself becoming a hardcore minimalist, but I truly believe in achieving a real balance between material needs and wants.

Pondering about this topic, the other day I asked myself the following question: What would I take with me if I were to leave my home? I find it a good mental and soul-searching exercise. One that lets you know how little you really need. I did this room by room, and my husband even played the game with me briefly, in our living room. The answer had to be significant for each item, and have meaning attached to it, a real reason for keeping the item. I was surprised at the very small number of items I came up with to keep (clothing did not count on this exercise, neither meds, etc.). The number really surprised me. I came up with less than 20 items in my entire home that had meaning and that I would consider taking along if I were to move. For example, my deceased grandmother’s rosary, and my deceased pet’s casted pawprints. It helped me understand a few truths. First, that I have more than I need. That not everything I own has meaningful value, and that I have detached from stuff considerably throughout the years. Also, that I can appreciate the beauty of something, I don’t necessarily need it, and I can live without it.

Many times, we spend so much money, energy, time, and effort in the material part of our existence without even realizing how much weight it puts on our daily living. I still like things, but I don’t need them for my existence or happiness; I think that is where real balance is found. When things don’t weigh in our lives and do not take priority over it, thus affecting other more important issues such as time, energy, financial well-being, time with loved ones … then, a balance has been found. This type of balance goes beyond decluttering. It is not just shedding stuff away, or of an organizational value, instead, it is centering and puts in perspective our material priorities and highlights meaningful value.

I encourage you to give this little exercise a try. It is eye opening, and fun too. Certainly freeing.

Sweet December

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Here in Southern Virginia, December is milder in comparison to Jersey, however, when it is cold, you can feel it in your bones, deep in your bones. Sunday, I woke up in the middle of the night and looked through the window; it was snowing, a little surprise since we were not expecting anything in our area, and it had been raining all day. It was a decent dusting that certainly spoke of dreaming of a white Christmas.

It is beginning to look a lot like Christmas. (Photo by M.A.D.)

Christmas decor has become simpler for us since we moved here, especially outdoors. Indoors, I like little touches here and there, not too much, a little something in each room. Life has become simpler in many ways.

I have always liked the look of two potted trees at each side of the front door, and a wreath, but I did not want to spend money on two artificial trees and large wreath, so I made mine. From time to time, I might find a little cedar tree growing in an area where it should not. I remove it and plant it in a pot until it grows large enough (about 12 inches) to be replanted in the perimeter of the property. I have been growing three tiny cedars that were about 2-3 inches when I found them, all on the same day. These have grown quite lovely. These grow fast. I planted one on a cement urn. It will become an outdoor Christmas tree. Now its branches are not strong enough to support a string of lights, so I attached a bow.

Little cedar growing to become a Christmas tree. (Photo by M.A.D.)

I planted the other two cedars on large pots and placed them at each side of the front door. These look lovely and will continue to grow. When these become too big for the porch, I will plant them on our property, and I will keep an eye for any little cedars that can take their place on the porch.

Little Cedars in training. (Photo by M.A.D.)
I made the wreath from recycled ornaments and greenery that I already had.

Here, December is a prelude to the colder months, and temperatures and weather are all over the place; one day could be freezing, the next day, very warm. Overall, I have found summer to be hot and humid, and winter, cold and wet, and not every year we get a considerable amount of snow. In fact, one year did not snow at all. I find the weather here very variable. Do I miss the Jersey blizzards? No, but I do miss other things.

A little stroll around town during the season is magical. The town dresses up for the holidays, and in a warm evening, it is enjoyable.

A little bit of history. (Photo by M.A.D.)
Lighting the lanterns in the evening is a Chatham tradition. (Photo by M.A.D.)
The many lights around town are just lovely. (Photo by M.A.D.)
Almost as if straight out of a Thomas Kinkade painting. (Photo by M.A.D.)
People love to see the decorations on this home. (Photo by M.A.D.)

Stores dress up their windows as well. I have fallen in love with the magic of this little town.

For me, December is also a month of deep reflection in many areas of my life. A month of planning for the new year and of dreaming as well. But most important, it is when I celebrate the birth of my King and Savior, Jesus Christ, reflecting in all that it means and also, all the joy and beauty of the season: friends, family, decorations, food, traditions … It is all good, all a blessing.

Photo by M.A.D.

For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.

Isaiah 9:6 KJV

This will be my last post for this year. I want to wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a Happy Holiday Season. May your lives be filled with all the joy and love of God, and may your New Year be filled with all His blessings. Until next time.

Love and Light,

Maria Antonia Diaz

In Retrospect, and a Farmhouse Christmas

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Just a few more weeks until the end of the year, and for us it means closing projects and getting ready for winter. According to The Old Farmers Almanac, we should expect a cold and wet winter. If they are right, that means planning ahead for many things such as pellet fuel and other weather-related items. During winter, the focus shifts from the outdoors to indoors, and all outdoor projects cease. In retrospect, what I have learned throughout the renovation process of this old farmhouse can be summed up in one phrase besides hard work, and that is adding value. For those not familiar with this blog – my husband and I purchased a dilapidated 1910 farmhouse and set out to fix it one step at a time, for the long term. At that point, there was not much value on the structure, but the land and a good foundation. We realized that anything we were to do to the structure would increase its value over time. Our main goal has been to build value over time. We had a minimal budget to make it livable, and from that point on to improve it. One of the things we focused on due to budget limits was to forgo “the fancy” and go for solid materials, whether recycled or new, and at a discount from various sources, preferably. We obtained materials through different venues: contractor surplus, Craigslist, discount stores, antique shops … and some we bought new from home improvement stores, but always minding sales and sticking to the budget.

At first, we prioritized on adding value vs curve appeal or latest trends. One of the main reasons for that was realizing that because we planned on living here for a long time, the newest and fanciest of materials would become “dated” over time, thus losing appeal for future buyers. It was the opposite approach to flipping a home, where the focus is to attract new buyers quickly. Adding value over time will continue to be the focus, until the time comes to sell, which will probably be in our late golden years. By now, we have more than tripled our initial investment, and we are satisfied with that. There is much more to be done “at budget,” however, always keeping in mind adding value. Curve appeal will continue to be added small bits at a time, which will enhance value. Adding value to a property can be done by adding features that stand the test of time or improving existing ones. Also, features that appreciate with time instead of depreciating. A good example would be adding land, or even building an addition that recuperates the initial investment plus, over time. Creating an attractive landscape is another way.

The concept of adding value can be applied to writing or anything in life. When I started this blog many years ago, I set out to write about two journeys at once, writing my novels and restoring this farmhouse. Both journeys have been rewarding and enjoyable; however, far from finished, more half-way into the journey. As long as I keep my focus on value and not on trends, quantity, or fast-paced agendas, I will be fine and on time.

I will share a few pictures of this old farmhouse decked for the holidays. It has been a long (and rewarding) way. Hope you enjoy them.

I hope you are inspired to give the old a second chance, and to keep on going toward your goal, whatever that might be, defying the odds.

I will end this post with a favorite quote.

I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.

2 Timothy 4:7

‘Tis the Season

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It is the season to look up, down, and all around. No matter where we look, there is something to be seen. From meteor showers to leaves on the ground, critters looking for shelter, or the bright moon, to planets that look like bright stars; all of it is beautiful. There is also the unusual, the unexpected, like a spring flower coming up in the garden in the cold weather, or the late red rose that doesn’t wither after a frost. All of it, although simple, is wondrous.

A majestic morning moon peeking through the leafless branches.
That very bright star on a very dark night.
The same star (I think it is planet Jupiter) zoomed in.
The ground covered in leaves (for the third time).

Nature is ready to take a rest, but it is still whispering its wonders, and displaying its magic.

Garden Offerings, Better Late than Never, and a Thankful Heart

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Yummy carrots (photo by M.A.D.)
Sweet potatoes that look like carrots (Photo by M.A.D.)

Here in the USA, we will be celebrating Thanksgiving Day very soon, on November 23rd. For many, it marks the start of the Holiday season; others call it Turkey Day, in reference to the main dish served, roasted turkey. When I think about it, there is so much to be thankful for, not only on that day, but every single day. From the moment I open my eyes to receive a brand-new day the simple blessings are many. Take a moment and think about it; even that first cup of coffee is a blessing not to be taken for granted.

It is easy to be thankful when everything is going well in our lives, but not so easy when things are not working as expected or when undesirable and sad events happen. It is then when a thankful heart, although difficult, will benefit us the most. It will open the door to peace within, even in the middle of the storm. Giving sincere and heartfelt thanks to our God when we feel “less blessed and challenged” will humble our soul and will be a step taken in order for us to appreciate what is good in our lives, which is plenty.

Being thankful in the midst of sad or painful situations is not easy, but it is a start, one that gets noticed by the same God that only wants to shower us with blessings. When everything is going fine in our lives, sometimes, we forget and take for granted many things, many people. We might want more, become unhappy with the status quo, and totally disregard our daily blessings. Sometimes, what brings us into focus are the same things we dread or fear, and those things become a tool to bring us back to a state of appreciation, and therefore, a grateful heart. Every day presents an opportunity to be thankful. Happy Thanksgiving Day!

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace.

Romans 15:13 NIV

The Lord is faithful to all His promises and loving toward all He has made.

Psalm 145:13 NIV

Let us come before Him with thanksgiving.

Psalm 95:2 NIV

Welcoming Autumn

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This year I have been in the mood for Autumn days. It is almost here, and I have enjoyed already a few crisp mornings, decorated a bit to enjoy the season, and collected a few veggies from the garden. Wild turkeys have been visiting, and I saw the first large flock of starlings flying by. This year, they did not stop here, but kept flying. I hope the next flock does; hundreds of starlings pecking on the grass is lovely to see. The birds are almost gone, and I have not seen a hummingbird in the past couple of weeks. A few leaves have fallen, and some trees are starting to change color. Nature is preparing for a new season. Just as in life, change is needed for a new season, even when transition might hurt. Rebirth always follows.

Love and Light

Farmhouse Project – The Side Entrance

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We are trying to finish a few projects that were scheduled for this year, and one of them was to fix the bottom part of the side entrance. Water accumulates when it rains, thus forming a puddle, and later on, it turns to mud. My husband worked on this project over the past weekend, and I love the result. One more item taken off the long list, and we are happy with that. There are still a few projects that were scheduled for this year but will have to wait until next year. We might be able to tackle one or two more, but not more than that. For the purpose of this post, and so that the reader can appreciate the before and after, I will share some pictures from the early days when we bought the old farmhouse showing that particular area as well.

The Process

First, my husband measured the area and built a frame, tested it, and later on, removed all the grass in that area and leveled the ground. Then, he attached and fixed the frame, poured cement, leveled the cement, scoured the sides, and let it set. It took a couple of days for it to dry. Last, he removed the wood frame, and cleaned the area. It was a simple process, but it took time. We decided to leave the steps the way they are now because they are in good condition, and so far, there is no need to redo them. We worked on these steps when we bought the place.

The Before

This was the condition of this area when we bought the old farmhouse. It’s been a long way. The two gargoyles go with me wherever I go.

One more project done on this old farmhouse. I hope that you enjoyed the pictures and reading about the process, and that it inspired you in some way.

Love and Light