existence

Reflections: One Day at a Time, One Step at a Time

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Photo by M.A.D

One day at a time, one step at a time.

Life would be much more pleasant if we would live in that way. This is a lesson I learned later in life. In my younger years, multitasking and the idea of a “superwoman” who thrived on a crammed schedule and did everything to perfection was idealized. Many of us, gender aside, followed that way of living in our everyday interaction. I remember feeling “guilty” if I had “free time” to myself and even worrying that I were to become lazy if I indulged on even an hour of “unproductive” being. The years passed by, and I had become entrapped in one of the biggest lies Society sold me. When I think about it, that way of life was very materialistic in essence, even when I never saw myself as a materialistic person, on the contrary.

Today, I repeated this question, what is truly important to me? Throughout the years, the answer has been narrowed to include the issues at the core of my true values and loves. Today, I finally understand the meaning of living one day at a time, one step at a time, and from that realization, a sense of peace within that recognizes that life is not a race, and I don’t need trophies or crowns to validate my existence; God has already done so when He made me. It is beautiful to achieve dreams and to celebrate our achievements and of others as well, but not at the expense of living. The mere existence of achieving without the joy and beauty of living is contraindicating. Maybe Hans Christian Anderson understood this well.

“Just living is not enough, said the butterfly, one must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower.” Hans Christian Anderson

Love and Light

The Next Season

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Photo by M.A.D.

Today, I found myself wishing that Spring was here already. Autumn and Winter used to be my favorite seasons when I lived in New Jersey. For a reason that truly eludes me, Spring and Summer have become my favorite seasons here in Virginia. Sometimes, we find ourselves thinking or wishing for the next “season” in life instead of living and being present in the season we are in. I truly believe that each season in life has something to teach us, whether that season is challenging or one of many blessings.

Many times, we rush through life unaware of our present season instead of living our best time in it. We are always thinking of a future season that may or may not materialize because none of us is guaranteed another day or even another second. We go through life making plans, worrying about the future, and ignoring all the good that the season we are in brings with it. We say things like, “time is money,” or “time is of the essence;” however, in trying to capture time, at the same time, we are letting it go. Call it the pursuit of happiness or the pursuit of wealth, or any other thing that we might spend our entire life going after, when we look back, it is all that – a pursuit through time, always wishing for another season.

“To every thing, there is a season, and a time for every purpose under the heaven.” Ecclesiastes 3:1 KJV

Of Plans and Works

/ inkspeare
Photo by M.A.D.

A new year represents a fresh start for many of us. We evaluate the previous year, check a few boxes, and set new goals. Sometimes, we are disappointed because we did not accomplish as much as we wanted to in the previous year; other times, we are satisfied with our performance. For others, it represents a challenge because they can already identify the areas of struggle ahead.

Whether dread or inspiration, when we look at the new year, one thing that we can always count on is hope. Hope for a better year. Each day represents a blank canvas. We might have to deal with a few smudges here and there, but as long as we keep hope we can paint a new picture or add some color to the one we are painting.

When we feel hopeless it is as if we are covered in darkness. One cannot see the light; one cannot see the colors. Setting goals and planning is good; however, there are times when despite careful planning and hard work, things don’t go our way, or at first glance they don’t seem to go as expected. Add to that a few years of hard work, determination and no results, and it can break your spirit, and burn you out. If you have experienced it, you know well what I mean.

At one point or another, we all will experience setbacks, disappointments, heartache, hopelessness, and brokenness, to various degrees. It is how we view/react during those times that will determine our comeback and the length of time we stay in the shadows.

“I sought the Lord and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.” Psalm 34:4

It is good to set goals and to plan. To get somewhere there must be a destination and a map.

“Commit your works to the Lord, and your plans will be established.” Proverbs 16:3

My best wishes for the year ahead.

Best of Wishes

/ inkspeare

It is a windy and rainy day; I love days like this one. I can see leaves falling and hear the wind, as the raindrops hit the window glass. There is a mystifying and peaceful feeling about it, very serene. I feel tucked-in, secure inside, the warmth of home. I guess nature mimics that feeling, because all critters do the same; they are nestled in their habitats. On days like this one, one can help it but reminisce and hope for the promises of the new year. Soon, the holidays will be here and gone, and we are left with the expectation of a brand-new year, a fresh opportunity to do better, but in reality, every brand-new day is just that, a gift, a new opportunity. Whether to keep on going, to start over, or simply, be grateful for what is, it is a blessed gift. Some people say, “what matters is this moment;” but I think that what matters is what I do with this moment; we all have to live it, one way or another.

When we cease to exist, moments do not matter anymore; it all blends into eternity. I guess where we’ll spend it matters. Challenges come and go, dreams do as well. We live and give meaning and purpose to our living or we strive looking for it. If we find it, we count ourselves lucky, blessed; if we don’t, we search all our life, or feel cursed, not knowing that the mere act of living has purpose in itself, if we dare to see. Life reveals itself. It reveals its miracles every single day, and all of it in the midst of our challenges and blessings. The breath of the Creator is in every one of us. Every time that we open our eyes to receive the blessing of another day is reason enough, purpose in itself, to make the best of what we are given. Life will never be perfect, and there will always be challenges, ups and downs, the unexpected, and the undesirable, but with it, also the human God-given capacity to dream, to hope, to love, and to feel every second of our experience here, until we come home.

“For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given, and the government shall be upon his shoulder; and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.” Isaiah 9:6

“May the Lord bless you and keep you; may the Lord shine his face upon you and be gracious to you; may the Lord lift up his face upon you and give you peace.” Numbers 6: 24-26

Wishing you a very merry Christmas, a happy holiday season, and a blessed new year.

It is the Little Things

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Photo by M.A.D.

It is the little things that make life sweet. If we only waited for the big things, the big successes, the big surprises, or the extraordinary things to be present, living would not be as sweet and meaningful. The little things that we sometimes fail to notice or take for granted, usually in the pursuit of something bigger, are the ones that take our breath away when we are present enough in living to notice them. An unexpected bloom in winter, the sunray illuminating the face of a child, the play of light and shadow in the woods at dusk … these are countless, unlimited moments that sweeten one’s day, when we care to notice. A big achievement brings joy, and a sense of pride and satisfaction, but it is the little things that remain after the big moment has passed. It is these little things and moments in life what refreshes a weary soul, sweetens a hectic day, and appease a restless spirit.

Love and Light

The Influence of People in Your Life

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Influence – to affect or change how someone or something develops, behaves, or thinks. (Cambridge Dictionary)

We are in the information era; however, I think we are a bit further along than that. We are in the influence era. Although we have always been influenced by others, whether family, friends, education, marketing, politics, religion … it is now when “influencers” are found everywhere, at every level of society, and even recognized as an occupation, that is, thanks to the development of the internet, and with it, social media venues. However, artificial intelligence is adding another layer to this era of influence, and this is only the beginning. I think that all markets will be changed by this in a significant way. In my opinion, we are entering a new era.

Aside from this, we have always been influenced by something or someone, directly or indirectly. The adage, “Birds of a feather flock (fly) together”, speaks of this influence. Who we allow in our close circle, whether we realize it or not, will influence us in a positive or negative way. Even when we think that we are strong enough to remain neutral in our relationships, there is always a part that is influenced by the other person(s). Sometimes, by the time we realize the type, depth, and degree of such influential forces, some damage has been done. Whom we have listened to, walk with, and entertained in life, those influences, have molded some of our responses/decisions, and views in life. Sometimes, an influential relationship will be beneficial, other times, the opposite, and years of such relationship(s) will affect, change, our development. It is usually after a long period of time that we begin to realize how a particular relationship influenced our outlook and behavior as well, and down the road, many of the results we observe in life due to choices we have made. This is not to blame others for our own choices, but to recognize the power of influences in our daily living. I have heard many times that “you become who you befriend.” You can develop a positive outlook or a “poor and doom” mentality. The other day, I was listening to someone talk, and every other word was can’t, never … words along those lines. I understood what was being said behind the scenes.

We are social beings, we tend to form groups, and we have a basic need for belonging. How that need is filled is up to us, as adults, that is. When I watch the news, and I see so much turmoil, hate, irrational behavior, verbal and physical attacks, and other less than civilized behavior, I see “influence” at play. When there is extreme polarity, taking sides becomes harder for the observer. The least of two evils might not be enough. Values are there for a reason, a sort of compass, but those values are subject to influences throughout our life. White or black might not be enough, and gray seems a forced compromise sometimes.

Blaming others (influencers) for our choices is denying personal responsibility and eventually, hindering our growth as human beings; it diminishes our humanity, and in a way, our ability to recognize influential forces in our lives, including our own. We reject our free-will, our most precious gift and essence.

Life’s Lemons

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For the purpose of this post, I will use an allegory. Ever heard the saying, “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade?” It is certainly a positive outlook, but many people see the lemonade making as one time event. What if you are tiered of life’s lemons? What if you are just tired of making lemonade? What if you just don’t care about making any more lemonade because you are just not up to it anymore? Life is unpredictable, and some of us don’t get one or two lemons, we get an entire orchard. Life is not fair, and maybe, by now you are just tired of making lemonade and drinking it too. You have reached the point of letting these lemons rot, and you don’t even care if they stink.

Many of us have been there at one point or another, and if not, count yourself blessed and be grateful for it. Society expects people to grab the juicer and start making lemonade right away, many times in the midst of a lemon rainfall. If we don’t, we are “lacking courage” or are labeled of “too little faith,” or many other things. Many times, we are expected to bounce back at the blink of an eye, and we are bombarded with positive thinking messages and expectations, as if we are being rushed to get well and function again; it is expected. It is what people do, to bounce back from a “sour episode” as soon as possible, to keep going on, to keep on living. And that is what we want to do. Deep inside we wish that tomorrow was different as quickly as possible. It is harder when other people depend on us.

Every person is different, and we all react in similar or not too similar ways to life’s situations. The way I see it is that we know our own internal temperature; we know our life’s speed, and we know how hurt and affected we have been by an avalanche of lemons. Or maybe, one large lemon is all it takes to weaken our strength and make us doubt our own courage. Besides God, we are the only ones to know how we truly feel, how hard we did fall, and how much time until we can even stand up, much more give that first step again. We should not feel pressured by the growing line in front of our lemonade stand. If any pressure, it should be our own desire or eagerness to join the land of the happy living again.

Whether or not we are ready to make lemonade, in our terms that is, we should consider a few things. We don’t have to make lemonade right away, and we don’t have to make it alone. There are people standing in line at the lemonade stand that are willing to go behind the counter and help us make lemonade; some might even cheer us up while we try. We just have to let them know how thin and fragile our glass is at the time, so they don’t stir too fast in their eagerness to help. But most important, we have the help and love of the Creator of it all (of the lemons, the lemonade stand, the lemon-makers, the helpers …) and He is certainly waiting patiently and lovingly for us to make the sweetest lemonade of all.

Perfect Timing

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Although we had a mild winter, for some reason, it feels a long one. We had a bit of a cool down this week, and even frost overnight. I am glad that I did not jump ahead and planted any veggies, otherwise the timing would have been wrong.

In life, perfect timing seems to be an important issue, more than money or drive. How many times people have had all the money and resources, but it was just not the “right time?” Whatever the project or venture, it did not come to fruition. Immediately, we tend to label it as failure, and even label ourselves as such. What was important for us were results. We forget quickly about the journey, all the effort, work, and focus we put into a project. As if that doesn’t count at all. We only see that we failed. Simply put, results were more important than the journey itself. By disregarding our journey, we forget the lessons learned, and sometimes, the lesson is more important than the result we were hoping for, but we fail to see it because we are too focused on the outcome. After all, we labor hard for something, right? Most people do. We trade something for something else. Time for money, money for things … In the meantime, we forget all that we learned, and how it shaped us. Because we are so conditioned to trade something for something, when we trade our hard work and effort, our mental focus, even emotional energy, and something does not materialize at the end, we blame and label ourselves as failure, and even punish ourselves deep in our hearts. We end up feeling frustrated, tired, lost, and another mental game starts. We think that there must be something wrong with us because we start comparing ourselves to others who have obtained the results we wanted and worked so hard, even sacrificed for, but never materialized. Once we jump into that rollercoaster, our self-esteem is (naturally) going to suffer; then, our trust and believe in ourselves are lost.

What is perfect timing? Many define it as being in the right place at the right time, other people as a kiss from Lady Luck. I define it as learning to be quiet enough that I can see the picture, appreciate the lesson, and wait for the direction that God has for me. I view perfect timing as God’s timing, separate from my human perception of how things should be and end. Learning that has made a difference in my life and how I define success and failure. Perfect timing is God’s speed.

Faith Moves Mountains

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Faith moves mountains. Jesus said that (Matthew 17:20). It is truth for Christians, or it should. Why is it so hard to believe what seems impossible? Maybe because of our human nature. We tend to focus on the problem more than the outcome. Faith is defined as “the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” (Hebrews 11:1) That seems to go against our human nature, yet we have all the capacity for hope and conviction. It is in our darkest hour that we put that truth to the test. Our mountain suddenly seems insurmountable compared to our conviction at the moment; however, hope can only grow, and grow bigger than a mountain. Our assurance doesn’t come from our own human effort, but from the One who said that a little faith moves mountains.

“Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” Matthew 17:20-21

Whatever our mountain, let’s climb it with hope and conviction, eventually, it won’t be in our field of vision; it would have moved from the horizon.

The Passing of Time

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Photo by M.A.D.

It is a rainy day. As I sit in my favorite chair, I glance at the cedar trees that line up the driveway. They dance gently in the wind. The trees have grown so tall since the first time I saw them, back then, when we looked at the property. They were at most, three feet tall, growing wild and free. We considered getting rid of them to open up more land, but my love of pine trees convinced me to keep them all, and I am glad we did, because now, I can look at these trees and smile. They are so lovely, most of them towering over 25 feet, a testament to the passing of time.

I used to think that time is just human invention, human perception to guide humanity throughout the days while living in a material world. In a way, it is true; however, time is more than that. Nature speaks of it “all the time” throughout the seasons, the harvest, the growth of anything and everything on earth. Throughout the journey that each one of us sets on. Time is the silent keeper of our days. One has only to look outside, especially now that winter has given way to spring, and see how the landscape changes daily. Have you ever been amazed at how fast the trees grow their leaves? As if overnight.

The miracle of life throughout the eyes of time. Time becomes more precious when we don’t have enough of it. Youth doesn’t mind the passing of time in the same way, unless life depends on it. In late golden years, time becomes precious, almost borrowed, a divine gift of sorts. It takes on a different meaning; it becomes the friend and foe of life, a duality that only a soul who has lived well comprehends, while finding peace in that knowledge. The eternity of time suddenly seems to dissolve; it has a beginning and end.