existence

It is About Focus and Faith

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While researching, I came across the following quote, which inspired this blogpost.

“Dictatorships are one-way streets. Democracy boasts two-way traffic.” Alberto Moravia

While reading the above quote, these poetic lines came to mind.

A People’s Will

Soaring above, keen eye, unsteady flight

Eagle must rest on steady land.

Time to choose,

One way street or two-way traffic.

Alberto Moravia was an Italian writer, whom I am not familiar with or have read any of his works; however, this quote stuck with me. It inspired the following.

Many times, people become discouraged by the current political environment. It might affect people in many different ways, whether mentally, emotionally, physically, and even spiritually. There are many things we cannot control directly; however, we can always control how we react to certain issues, events, and our environment. When we focus on what we can control in our daily lives, our focus change, and so does our response and attitude. What I write here, I have applied myself.

Here are examples of controllables. These controllables apply to many of the issues that we might be experiencing under less than pleasant conditions.

I can control,

A healthy diet and exercise

All my decisions

How I decide to start my day and end it

My thoughts

My spending

My relationship with God

My reaction to the people I interact with, or whom I choose to include in my circle

How I choose to view each challenge/problem

How I manage all my resources

How I choose to live my life

My degree of gratitude each day

What I give my time and effort to

The battles I choose to fight or not

How I view my space, my home, my possessions, with gratitude or not

How I value my life

The priorities and values I set daily

How I manage my time and money

My dreams

My expectations of myself, others, and life

The guilt I put on myself and others

What I let into my mind and space

The physical things I surround myself with

How I treat myself (level of respect, love and understanding) as well as others.

These are only a few controllables, but in my opinion and experience, the most important ones, and the ones that will help center our focus when times are not what we expect or desire.

Lost and Found

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Photo by M.A.D.

She stared at me, her semblance a bit familiar. She seemed a bit tired, a gaze serious enough for me to notice her. Her features spoke to me of olden days, her faint smile, of recognition. A kin allure of something once shared. I studied her face. She glanced back, truth or dare. Not until I journeyed deep into her eyes, did I truly see the woman in the mirror.

Ten Things I Would Tell My Young Self if I Could Go Back in Time

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“Enjoy a plate of homemade cookies from time to time.” Photo by M.A.D.

Rainy days make good thoughts. Sometimes, I go back in time and observe the younger version of me, through my memories. I can truly detach and see her with kinder eyes, every step, dreams, goals … through good times, not so good times, and even scary times. In times of wisdom, confusion, loss, fear, naiveté, and even doubt, of happiness and growth … In moments of pure bliss and in times of desperation but always striving for more. Then I think, if I could only go back and tell her; hence, the title of this blogpost. Although there is much more that I would tell her, here are ten things (me-truths) I would definitely tell her (in no particular chronological order).

You are never too little or too much; God made you with value for Him.

Life is not a race against time; it is a celebration of time, slow down a bit.

What you truly think of yourself is more important than what other people think of you; really, it is.

It is perfectly ok not to achieve the ideal of perfection because it is a lie.

Most so-called experts make it up as they go.

One day, you too will be old, in the blink of an eye.

Evil-intentioned people do exist in real life.

Religion is man-made, but Jesus is not.

Never hand off your agency to another; never!

God will never abandon you, no matter what.

What would you tell a younger version of you?

Reflections: One Day at a Time, One Step at a Time

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Photo by M.A.D

One day at a time, one step at a time.

Life would be much more pleasant if we would live in that way. This is a lesson I learned later in life. In my younger years, multitasking and the idea of a “superwoman” who thrived on a crammed schedule and did everything to perfection was idealized. Many of us, gender aside, followed that way of living in our everyday interaction. I remember feeling “guilty” if I had “free time” to myself and even worrying that I were to become lazy if I indulged on even an hour of “unproductive” being. The years passed by, and I had become entrapped in one of the biggest lies Society sold me. When I think about it, that way of life was very materialistic in essence, even when I never saw myself as a materialistic person, on the contrary.

Today, I repeated this question, what is truly important to me? Throughout the years, the answer has been narrowed to include the issues at the core of my true values and loves. Today, I finally understand the meaning of living one day at a time, one step at a time, and from that realization, a sense of peace within that recognizes that life is not a race, and I don’t need trophies or crowns to validate my existence; God has already done so when He made me. It is beautiful to achieve dreams and to celebrate our achievements and of others as well, but not at the expense of living. The mere existence of achieving without the joy and beauty of living is contraindicating. Maybe Hans Christian Anderson understood this well.

“Just living is not enough, said the butterfly, one must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower.” Hans Christian Anderson

Love and Light

The Next Season

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Photo by M.A.D.

Today, I found myself wishing that Spring was here already. Autumn and Winter used to be my favorite seasons when I lived in New Jersey. For a reason that truly eludes me, Spring and Summer have become my favorite seasons here in Virginia. Sometimes, we find ourselves thinking or wishing for the next “season” in life instead of living and being present in the season we are in. I truly believe that each season in life has something to teach us, whether that season is challenging or one of many blessings.

Many times, we rush through life unaware of our present season instead of living our best time in it. We are always thinking of a future season that may or may not materialize because none of us is guaranteed another day or even another second. We go through life making plans, worrying about the future, and ignoring all the good that the season we are in brings with it. We say things like, “time is money,” or “time is of the essence;” however, in trying to capture time, at the same time, we are letting it go. Call it the pursuit of happiness or the pursuit of wealth, or any other thing that we might spend our entire life going after, when we look back, it is all that – a pursuit through time, always wishing for another season.

“To every thing, there is a season, and a time for every purpose under the heaven.” Ecclesiastes 3:1 KJV

Of Plans and Works

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Photo by M.A.D.

A new year represents a fresh start for many of us. We evaluate the previous year, check a few boxes, and set new goals. Sometimes, we are disappointed because we did not accomplish as much as we wanted to in the previous year; other times, we are satisfied with our performance. For others, it represents a challenge because they can already identify the areas of struggle ahead.

Whether dread or inspiration, when we look at the new year, one thing that we can always count on is hope. Hope for a better year. Each day represents a blank canvas. We might have to deal with a few smudges here and there, but as long as we keep hope we can paint a new picture or add some color to the one we are painting.

When we feel hopeless it is as if we are covered in darkness. One cannot see the light; one cannot see the colors. Setting goals and planning is good; however, there are times when despite careful planning and hard work, things don’t go our way, or at first glance they don’t seem to go as expected. Add to that a few years of hard work, determination and no results, and it can break your spirit, and burn you out. If you have experienced it, you know well what I mean.

At one point or another, we all will experience setbacks, disappointments, heartache, hopelessness, and brokenness, to various degrees. It is how we view/react during those times that will determine our comeback and the length of time we stay in the shadows.

“I sought the Lord and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.” Psalm 34:4

It is good to set goals and to plan. To get somewhere there must be a destination and a map.

“Commit your works to the Lord, and your plans will be established.” Proverbs 16:3

My best wishes for the year ahead.

Best of Wishes

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It is a windy and rainy day; I love days like this one. I can see leaves falling and hear the wind, as the raindrops hit the window glass. There is a mystifying and peaceful feeling about it, very serene. I feel tucked-in, secure inside, the warmth of home. I guess nature mimics that feeling, because all critters do the same; they are nestled in their habitats. On days like this one, one can help it but reminisce and hope for the promises of the new year. Soon, the holidays will be here and gone, and we are left with the expectation of a brand-new year, a fresh opportunity to do better, but in reality, every brand-new day is just that, a gift, a new opportunity. Whether to keep on going, to start over, or simply, be grateful for what is, it is a blessed gift. Some people say, “what matters is this moment;” but I think that what matters is what I do with this moment; we all have to live it, one way or another.

When we cease to exist, moments do not matter anymore; it all blends into eternity. I guess where we’ll spend it matters. Challenges come and go, dreams do as well. We live and give meaning and purpose to our living or we strive looking for it. If we find it, we count ourselves lucky, blessed; if we don’t, we search all our life, or feel cursed, not knowing that the mere act of living has purpose in itself, if we dare to see. Life reveals itself. It reveals its miracles every single day, and all of it in the midst of our challenges and blessings. The breath of the Creator is in every one of us. Every time that we open our eyes to receive the blessing of another day is reason enough, purpose in itself, to make the best of what we are given. Life will never be perfect, and there will always be challenges, ups and downs, the unexpected, and the undesirable, but with it, also the human God-given capacity to dream, to hope, to love, and to feel every second of our experience here, until we come home.

“For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given, and the government shall be upon his shoulder; and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.” Isaiah 9:6

“May the Lord bless you and keep you; may the Lord shine his face upon you and be gracious to you; may the Lord lift up his face upon you and give you peace.” Numbers 6: 24-26

Wishing you a very merry Christmas, a happy holiday season, and a blessed new year.

It is the Little Things

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Photo by M.A.D.

It is the little things that make life sweet. If we only waited for the big things, the big successes, the big surprises, or the extraordinary things to be present, living would not be as sweet and meaningful. The little things that we sometimes fail to notice or take for granted, usually in the pursuit of something bigger, are the ones that take our breath away when we are present enough in living to notice them. An unexpected bloom in winter, the sunray illuminating the face of a child, the play of light and shadow in the woods at dusk … these are countless, unlimited moments that sweeten one’s day, when we care to notice. A big achievement brings joy, and a sense of pride and satisfaction, but it is the little things that remain after the big moment has passed. It is these little things and moments in life what refreshes a weary soul, sweetens a hectic day, and appease a restless spirit.

Love and Light

The Influence of People in Your Life

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Influence – to affect or change how someone or something develops, behaves, or thinks. (Cambridge Dictionary)

We are in the information era; however, I think we are a bit further along than that. We are in the influence era. Although we have always been influenced by others, whether family, friends, education, marketing, politics, religion … it is now when “influencers” are found everywhere, at every level of society, and even recognized as an occupation, that is, thanks to the development of the internet, and with it, social media venues. However, artificial intelligence is adding another layer to this era of influence, and this is only the beginning. I think that all markets will be changed by this in a significant way. In my opinion, we are entering a new era.

Aside from this, we have always been influenced by something or someone, directly or indirectly. The adage, “Birds of a feather flock (fly) together”, speaks of this influence. Who we allow in our close circle, whether we realize it or not, will influence us in a positive or negative way. Even when we think that we are strong enough to remain neutral in our relationships, there is always a part that is influenced by the other person(s). Sometimes, by the time we realize the type, depth, and degree of such influential forces, some damage has been done. Whom we have listened to, walk with, and entertained in life, those influences, have molded some of our responses/decisions, and views in life. Sometimes, an influential relationship will be beneficial, other times, the opposite, and years of such relationship(s) will affect, change, our development. It is usually after a long period of time that we begin to realize how a particular relationship influenced our outlook and behavior as well, and down the road, many of the results we observe in life due to choices we have made. This is not to blame others for our own choices, but to recognize the power of influences in our daily living. I have heard many times that “you become who you befriend.” You can develop a positive outlook or a “poor and doom” mentality. The other day, I was listening to someone talk, and every other word was can’t, never … words along those lines. I understood what was being said behind the scenes.

We are social beings, we tend to form groups, and we have a basic need for belonging. How that need is filled is up to us, as adults, that is. When I watch the news, and I see so much turmoil, hate, irrational behavior, verbal and physical attacks, and other less than civilized behavior, I see “influence” at play. When there is extreme polarity, taking sides becomes harder for the observer. The least of two evils might not be enough. Values are there for a reason, a sort of compass, but those values are subject to influences throughout our life. White or black might not be enough, and gray seems a forced compromise sometimes.

Blaming others (influencers) for our choices is denying personal responsibility and eventually, hindering our growth as human beings; it diminishes our humanity, and in a way, our ability to recognize influential forces in our lives, including our own. We reject our free-will, our most precious gift and essence.

Life’s Lemons

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For the purpose of this post, I will use an allegory. Ever heard the saying, “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade?” It is certainly a positive outlook, but many people see the lemonade making as one time event. What if you are tiered of life’s lemons? What if you are just tired of making lemonade? What if you just don’t care about making any more lemonade because you are just not up to it anymore? Life is unpredictable, and some of us don’t get one or two lemons, we get an entire orchard. Life is not fair, and maybe, by now you are just tired of making lemonade and drinking it too. You have reached the point of letting these lemons rot, and you don’t even care if they stink.

Many of us have been there at one point or another, and if not, count yourself blessed and be grateful for it. Society expects people to grab the juicer and start making lemonade right away, many times in the midst of a lemon rainfall. If we don’t, we are “lacking courage” or are labeled of “too little faith,” or many other things. Many times, we are expected to bounce back at the blink of an eye, and we are bombarded with positive thinking messages and expectations, as if we are being rushed to get well and function again; it is expected. It is what people do, to bounce back from a “sour episode” as soon as possible, to keep going on, to keep on living. And that is what we want to do. Deep inside we wish that tomorrow was different as quickly as possible. It is harder when other people depend on us.

Every person is different, and we all react in similar or not too similar ways to life’s situations. The way I see it is that we know our own internal temperature; we know our life’s speed, and we know how hurt and affected we have been by an avalanche of lemons. Or maybe, one large lemon is all it takes to weaken our strength and make us doubt our own courage. Besides God, we are the only ones to know how we truly feel, how hard we did fall, and how much time until we can even stand up, much more give that first step again. We should not feel pressured by the growing line in front of our lemonade stand. If any pressure, it should be our own desire or eagerness to join the land of the happy living again.

Whether or not we are ready to make lemonade, in our terms that is, we should consider a few things. We don’t have to make lemonade right away, and we don’t have to make it alone. There are people standing in line at the lemonade stand that are willing to go behind the counter and help us make lemonade; some might even cheer us up while we try. We just have to let them know how thin and fragile our glass is at the time, so they don’t stir too fast in their eagerness to help. But most important, we have the help and love of the Creator of it all (of the lemons, the lemonade stand, the lemon-makers, the helpers …) and He is certainly waiting patiently and lovingly for us to make the sweetest lemonade of all.