existence

The Pursuit of a Simple Life is Not Simple

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It may seem as a contradiction but it has been my experience. Maybe, I over think stuff, maybe I am over-committed to stuff (and I don’t mean material stuff), but for many, the pursue of a simple life has started by abandoning all that is, and starting fresh; not my case. I love to hear stories about people who have made radical changes and quickly left their jobs, old life, material ties, and abandoned themselves to the pursuit of a meaningful and simple life, whether traveling the world, or doing something totally different – careers … Yes, I love those stories and deep inside, I wish I could do the same.

However, when I started the pursuit of a simple life, life got in the way of it. How it happens? To each its own, and circumstances are individual, that is the only explanation I have. It has taken work, time, and effort to start this pursuit – it almost takes all the fun out of it, right?

For me, the simple life goes beyond the abandonment of the current – it has taken the path of learning a new lifestyle, of changing career, understanding spirituality, and the attempt of moving physical locations, along with the systematic purging of the material, and the fulfillment of some material commitments as well. All that takes time, and it will take as much time as you are deep in it. Somehow, the simple becomes slow, systematic, complicated … far.

As long as there is an understanding of this reality, the pursuit of a simple life becomes a dream, a goal, an aspiration. You learn to ditch, you learn to do, you learn, and you learn, and at one point you get tired of learning and doing, and you want to learn to ditch more, but life becomes reality, and simplicity becomes a place down the road, and the wheels suffer wear and tear. It makes you think of the one who have jumped in the pursuit with no regrets and no second thoughts of what is behind – have they? I will never know – to each, its own.

One thing is for sure, the simple life does require other than a simplistic approach, at least, in my understanding. I have ditched, learned to do things different, to wait for the right time to be able to change physical locations, to change careers and to learn all needed to do that in the process, to deal with the close-minded, to deal with consequences, learned to accept time, and learned to let go of what doesn’t suit the simple life anymore – whether material, spiritual, or human.  In the meantime, I hope that time does not morph into lassitude, and pray that I don’t end up with broken wings.

monarch wings

Why Am I Here?

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I am sure that at one point or another we ask this question to ourselves.  It is the big question, at the brink of figuring out existentialism, our own, our desires, our goals, but no – it is more than that, the big Why.  But maybe that is not the only approach, or even the right approach; maybe, it is better to know that WE ARE HERE.  Yes, we are here and what you do with your time here is up to you and no one else. Do you really need a why to realize it? Or, do you dare to realize that YOU ARE HERE, and that in itself is one of the greatest discoveries and mysteries.  Dare to dream, but dare to accept that the infinite lives in you and you are here, in the infinite, while you try to figure out why.  Once you accept this, the why will be secondary to the greatness that you heart will experience, to the deep communion with all it is, and all it is inside you, and all is everything.

I came across this awesome NASA Timeless Earth video posted by youtuber boatright.  Watch it, and pay attention at how you feel when you are watching, and enjoy it because yes, you are a part of all that – of everything. All I can say is that I am glad that I AM HERE.

How to Stay Balanced When You are Upside Down

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A triangular prism, dispersing light; waves sh...

A triangular prism, dispersing light; waves shown to illustrate the differing wavelengths of light. (Click to view animation) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Today, I didn’t want to write about my novel or a writing topic, but instead, I wanted to write about what I was inspired at the moment.  So I asked my Muse, what do you want me to write about today? The title you just read came to mind, so that is what I am writing about this instant.

As someone who has known what this means, I can tell you that it is not easy to hang in there when everything has flipped upside down at one point in your life.  When your world hangs the opposite to your focus, it is easy to be discouraged, throw the towel, and just hang for eternity.  I think that hanging a bit is fine because you need to rest to fix your focus.  You need to rest emotionally, physically, and spiritually, as well as in the material state.  So give yourself time to just be, and let your broken spirit rest.

Once you have rested and pondered on your misery, the moment to make a decision knocks at the door of your heart, and you know that this is the time when you decide to pick yourself up and fix your focus, or maintain a state of hanging, sinking slowly into a deep hole.  Whether the contents of that hole is depression, sadness, anger, hopelessness, inertia, hate, laziness … and many other things, it is different to each individual.  However, when you are hanging upside down, after the rest, you will hear that knock, and you will have to answer.  Whether you start pulling at that rope, lifting yourself up slowly, and appreciating how the image comes back to focus bit by bit, or let the rope go, it is up to you.  One thing is for sure, you need to balance yourself to be able to pull that rope and getting yourself back up.  How is it possible to balance yourself when everything around you seems to be spinning out of control and you hang but by a leg?  It is not easy, but it is possible.  This happens when you rest and give yourself time to focus.

  • First, you need to recognize that you need help – whether from a professional or a best friend, and of course yourself.  Whether you can do this on your own, or need help is personal.
  • Second, you need to recognize that there are no blames in this process.  I truly believe that we are responsible for our own choices, and no one is to blame.
  • Third, you think about what you believe as truth in your life and make a commitment to yourself.
  • Fourth, you learn to view the world upside down for a while, and ponder about it.  What you discover about it may surprise you.
  • Fifth, you learn what your priorities are, and decide to make them your priority or not – knowing that there will be consequences to your decision (positive or negative).
  • Sixth, you accept to deal with those consequences understanding the process.
  • Seventh, you do this slowly, one step at a time.
  • Eight, you remain true to your beliefs and priorities when you start to fix your focus.
  • Ninth, you will discover that some things from your old upside down world, do not go into focus no matter how hard you try, so you will have to let those go, otherwise you will stay out of focus in some areas.  In this process, you will learn to say no.  You will learn that you will have to accept that you cannot please everyone. You will also learn to weigh which opinions matter more to you – others or yours.
  • Tenth, you must accept that no one can live your life but you, and that you cannot live your life according to other’s ideas of what your world should look like.  You have been given a responsibility to manage your life (a gift) and live it as well as you can; however your truths and priorities will guide you here.
  • Eleventh, this is when you start feeling that the image in front of you is just an image, and what matters is how you feel about it and how you live your life in this quasi upside down world.  You make it as straight as you want, and you do it one step at a time, balancing yourself in the process – checking from time to time your beliefs, truths, and priorities.
  • Twelfth, the realization that you are always in control hits you, and suddenly, even that you might be still pulling yourself up as you pull on the rope slowly, trying to straighten your world and fix your focus, you can see that the view upside down and in between is as ugly or beautiful as you make it to be, and that there is always a prism changing colors.

This is what I had to write today.

 

The Quest for Mind Domination – Our Quest

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English: Earth rotation as seen against the Mi...

English: Earth rotation as seen against the Milkyway-background. Animation from 20 single exposures with a DSLR on an motorized, equatorial mount. Deutsch: Rotation der Erde gegenüber dem Milchstrassenhintergrund. Animation aus 20 Einzelaufnahmen mit einer DSLR auf motorisierter, äquatorialer Montierung. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The other day, I was thinking about what makes “me” and inevitably, I went down memory lane, visiting childhood and young adult memories.  I saw a young mind being shaped by the people and experiences around it, a series of beliefs, traditions, cultural traits … which began clothing and molding “me.”   Although I turned out a decent human being, I realized that I could have shed out a few of those beliefs or ideas, with which I was not totally in tune with (as a young adult and older), but accepted anyway, since they had been passed on by generations and culture.

Many times, we feel obligated to believe or “honor” a system of beliefs/values/information that has been passed along in our upbringing and we end up living our life in a constant silent battle of ideas.  Our mind has been dominated by other’s beliefs/ideas and they have nested in us for so long, that even when we feel that we no longer need them, we feel obligated to carry them with us, in fear of dishonoring someone’s memory or culture or social ties.  We don’t realize the harm that we are doing to “me” when we keep holding on to ideas that do not fit us anymore.

In being fair to “me” I realized that one can only continue to grow and evolve if one sheds out all that does not feel in tune with the actual self, with the person that is and continues to be, whether that be religious, social, or cultural ideas.  Is that an easy thing to do? Not really; most likely, you will encounter opposition from many sides, internal and external, as well as judgement or pre-assumptions.  The real issue here is, do you keep evolving or do you “play nice” and hold on to those ideas (which do not serve you anymore) for self-preservation (avoiding judgement or hurting feelings).

It takes guts to say, “I am finally free and I don’t have to believe in anything anymore; I just am.”  The key words here are have to.  When you feel that you have to believe or accept an idea which you have outgrown you are denying the essence of being; you are reversing the process of creation, of creativity.  You may exist, but you are not – you are not creating, you are un-creating.  You are denying your essence (I’m not talking about ego here).  I choose to believe that I am part of a greater and collective creation, and that in order to honor (LOVE) that essence, first, I must honor (LOVE) my own.  To be (part of creation), first I have to know and respect that I am.  By acknowledging that, I am opening the door to LOVE, the essence to all.

 

The Ghost of a Thousand Lives

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Ghost?!

Ghost?! (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Muse made me do it …

The Ghost of a Thousand Lives

Where is the crown that makes you king?

Where is the sword that shines of courage?

Where is the stare that froze a thousand fires?

Where is the fire that melts an iceberg heart?

Where have you gone, the eyes cannot see,

If not but a speck of the brave, nor a sunshine ray,

In the depths of the soul, the hero is lost,

All that remains … the ghost of a thousand lives.

Dear Child

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Photo by M. Diaz

 

 

Dear Child,

Find me in the stillness of your soul, in the nature of things, their purity, their essence.  Find me in the song of the day, the sounds of a new beginning, the voice of a start as pure as the essence of your soul.  Dear child, find me in the time, the seconds, the hours… find me in the voice of the unknown yet to be revealed.  Find me, but most of all, find yourself, for there I reside.

Where to Go from Now

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Where to go from now?  This is a question that many of us ask, as we tend to worry sick about the future – career, finances, relationships …  We make plans, lists, life maps … you name it, in the hopes of being too careful about how we live our lives and plan our future.  We dream of better days, success, and happy lives … and that is good – planning for the future is good; however, we forget about the Now.

It doesn’t matter if you consider yourself a worry wart or  not, we all do it – we lose sleep about the promotion, the query, the bills … however, we forget to live the life that we have been gifted on this day.  Sometimes, it takes an unfortunate event, or a series (in stubborn cases) to make us realize that the important moment is the one that we have been given by our next breath, and the gift of a brand new day.  NOW is what truly matters.  I was having this conversation with one of my sisters and we agreed on how futile it is to sweat the big and small stuff when it hasn’t even showed up.

One of my favorite quotes from the bible Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 reads,

“To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to
embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.”

I like it because it reminds me of the Now and of the human condition and nature.  In my opinion, this verse “gets us.”  Sometimes, we don’t even understand our purpose under the sun; however, the Now is always there, and all we have to do is live it.

Next time the question “Where to go from now?” pops in your mind (or heart) answer it with a simple NOW.

The Mausoleum Writer

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This post was inspired by a postcard that my husband received in yesterday’s mail.  It was a promotional card for buying your own mausoleum.  The card is truly cute and kind of happy for such death talk.  It is colorful and direct to the point, and I thought that the message was delivered in a smart sassy way and pushed the right buttons – family – significant other – guilt.  The words Always and Alone are written in a fun aqua font so talking about the creepy topic is not so creepy, and that leaving the ones that you Always loved Alone to take care of the arrangements, is taken care ahead of time.  This marketing card is going to get noticed for certain – look at me, I’m writing about it on this blog.  It stands out from other too serious and “party of life poopers” promotional/marketing ads for funerals and mausoleums.  The funny thing is that my husband and I have not even reached the age of 50 yet.  But this got me thinking.  Once you are over the hill, society starts thinking of your funeral, assisted living or nursing home care, life insurance, reversible mortgages … and so on, the promotional/marketing literature keeps on coming, because this is how you are seen, with just a few steps closer to one of those alternatives.

This got me thinking some more – do I view myself in the same light?  The answer to that question was a bit conflicting and this is why.  I, for certain, don’t feel closer to a mausoleum or a nursing home, on the contrary, I feel young, healthy, and with much yet to live and do.  On the other side, realizing that I passed forty and fifty is in the horizon, brings a sense of urgency to my projects and things that I want to accomplish before hitting the mausoleum or the nursing home.  I have read more than once, that starting a writing career in your forties, is starting a bit late, and for that matter, any other ventures that may require time ahead of you.  I have never agreed with that philosophy.  I think that each one of us goes on a journey, and the time is right when the time is right, and opportunities abound at each bent of road.  The important thing is to follow your call, live your dream, and love what you do, but do it – no matter what age you happen to be.

I resent being told what to expect at any age, and I don’t  like to be told what to do about it either.  I am far from a procrastinator; however, I believe that there is a time for everything under the sun, and the sun keeps shining until my last breath – and that is when I would become the Mausoleum Writer.

Here is a picture of the Happy Death Card.

 

The front of the card.

This is the back of it.  I hid the business name, but you can see the sense of urgency, the pretty and happy font, and tons of marketing psychology in between the lines.

 

We had a good chuckle.  Do you think that you are too old for a writing career?