freedom

Following Your Bliss

/ inkspeare / 2 Comments
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What is bliss?  It is defined as:  supreme happiness; utter joy or contentment.  I define it as finding your balance, your equilibrium.  Each individual’s bliss is different.  And everyone operates at a different level.  Sometimes, we burn ourselves running after what we think will make us happier:  more money, another step on the corporate ladder, a bigger paycheck, or many other ideals.  In our search and journey we realize that something is missing, even when the prize has been obtained.  In the intense focus and chase of our goal, we fell out of balance – we lost our bliss.

Somehow, our prize is not as shiny as we thought it was.  And soon, we set our eyes on another goal, and the race starts all over again.  Setting goals, and planning is great, but we also have to find the balance while achieving them, otherwise we lose appreciation and become empty vessels looking for fulfillment.  So, how do we follow our bliss without ending up tired and disappointed?

Because everyone is unique, there is no recipe or mold.  The answer is within us, and all we have to do is look inside and figure out what makes us, not only happy, but whole.  When we realize what it is, slow and steady steps will take us there, while enjoying the process on the way.  Each day will bring its own rewards, but its challenges, too.

We live on an instant fast-paced society.  Everything was due yesterday.  We are conditioned to react and think fast.  If we want to follow our bliss, we will have to slow down the speed of life, or at least our perception of it (our attention).  When we live mindfully we are slowing down the speed and opening our minds and hearts to what makes us whole and happy.  Some of us, will make radical changes, others, small adjustments.  For some, the climb is steep, for others a small turn in the road.  But the rewards are living a happy and balanced life in harmony with one’s self and the world around us.  What could be better than that?

 

Planning Your New Year – Resolution Solution

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The New Year is around the corner, and we start thinking about new goals, plans, starting anew, and the inevitable – all the goals that we set and did not accomplish.  We feel guilty, and at our worst, as failures.  So we take the pen and paper and start all over again, sometimes repeating the same goals – promising ourselves:  “this year for sure …”  I’ve been there.

Setting goals and naming things that we want to accomplish should not be a painful or shameful process.  It should be a guide, a road map of what we want to do and where we want to end up.  But goals should be realistic and measurable.  Just saying: “I want to lose weight” is not enough.  Instead, go thru a series of questions like:  how many pounds, how, when will I schedule the how, and most important – why?  Why do I want to lose the weight?  Your motivator is your best weapon.  If you don’t know your why, most likely, another year will pass, with no results.  This formula should be applied to every goal or project that you plan for the New Year.

Take a planner or your PC and schedule in your goals, daily, weekly, or however you figured out that you will work at them throughout the entire year.  If you have a reminder every day of your goal schedule, then it is likely that you will work at them with more enthusiasm and determination.  Set an automatic reminder in your PC.  The list of goals written on December 31st is not enough – it has to be planned.

Start thinking realistically of the things that you want to accomplish this coming year; make your list, but don’t stop there – map out a schedule to make them real.  At the end of the year, even if some of them did not work out, most will – and you will feel better and more productive.  I find that by doing this, by the end of the year I see that I have crossed out a good part of my list.  Some goals are still there, but I am a few steps closer to them, and I can always continue to work on them.

One thing that I have observed in some people if that they take their goals as written in stone and will not deviate, even when there is a need for some modification.  Many times a goal is missed just because of this, which is ironic.  In addition, goals should be taken as a guide to where we want to be and not as a horse blinder that will prevent us to enjoy the scenery in the process.  It is good to set some goals but it is also good to leave some room for flexibility, change, and modification.

Happy New Year Planning!

Is it Fear of Failure or Fear of Success?

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Figure 20 from Charles Darwin's The Expression...

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As artists/writers we have heard how important it is to learn to deal with rejection.  Simply, it is part of the path we take.  Many books have been written about rejection.  We recognize rejection as part of the growth process and almost embrace it.  However, we are not so happy with the concept of failure.  We avoid failure, we fear it, and we want no part of it.  The fear of failure is paralyzing for some people, for others, it may be the fuel that propels them to keep excelling at what they do – we react differently in various circumstances.  These people, whether paralyzed or excelling, have something in common – the fear of failure.  However, there is a third group, which I am very aware of, simply because I found myself in that group once.

This third group thinks that they are afraid of failure; however, this is not the case.  The real fear has been disguised as fear of failure, but on the contrary, it is not failure what this groups fear – it is success.  Fear of success can be as paralyzing as the fear to fail.

Fear of success may be a personal issue and rooted in your childhood, or on any other phase of your life.  It is very hard to spot, and that is why it may hide itself as fear of failure or even of rejection.  Fear of success may involve being afraid of new things or new responsibilities, or even of the spot light and recognition that comes with success, in many cases.  The issue is personal.  If you think that you are afraid of failure, ask yourself why.  Ask again, and again … until you can’t ask no more; the answer may surprise you, as it did me.

Once in the open, your fear has no where else to hide and you can look at it straight, understand it, accept it, and move on.  Once you do this, it will never have the power to paralyze you, because it has been exposed.

So, is it fear of failure or fear of success?

The binding of Age

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If you grew up as I did, most likely, you will have the imprinted belief that as soon as you hit 40, you are going down hill.  I have seen a few over the hill greeting cards that seem to cater to that frame of thought.  Believing that this is the case, is a very dangerous thing because it binds you to certain expectations throughout your life.  Certain things should have happened before you turned 45, and if they have not, most likely you will abandon certain goals, and will end up feeling a failure.  What a sick belief!

The truth is that no one knows how long they will live and most people may live to their late eighties.  In this case, being 40, for example, is having half or more of your life to live.  This is not the time to abandon goals or feeling as a failure; on the contrary, it is the time to make them real and with more “gusto” since you have already enjoyed many years of being traditionally “young.”

Age is in your mind;  it is a matter of how your mind is set and of how it has been programmed all these years.  Yes, there are some physical changes on the outside, but the “you” inside the shell knows better.  No one likes wrinkles or the physical changes that come with age; if they did, plastic surgery and beauty aides would not exist.  I myself, am not a fan of wrinkles.  However, I have met young people who act as 90 year olds, and 80 year olds who act as if they were 25.  For those 80 year olds that still see a bright life ahead of them, age is just a number, and age does not bind them to any “society expectations” – they are the masters of their lives.

Technology – Big Brother or Big Sister?

/ inkspeare
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Much has been said about Big Brother, surveillance, and the intrusion of others in our private lives.  However, must of us embrace technology, and the latest fun and new gadgets in the market.  We play with them, we love them, get mad at them when they don’t work properly or when we don’t know how to use them, can’t live with them, can’t live without them …

From chips in cell phones that can track our every move, to surveillance cameras in the streets, to chips that can store our likes and dislikes and cater to our whims by sending just the right advertising piece, … we are being watched, like it or not.  However, it is not the feeling of distrust that Big Brother suggests, but more like the Big Sister that protect us, likes us, and to whom we look up to.  We embrace her, we play with her, we love her, and we get mad at her sometimes, but soon we forget.  Technology has become our Big Sister.

Shakespeare a Day 8

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“He hath a heart as sound as a bell and his tongue is the clapper; for what his heart thinks his tongue speaks.” – Much Ado About Nothing

Love it!  Our bells ring of love, hate, joy, sadness, passion, hurt, envy, anger, awe, spirit …  What ever melody we play inside, notes play on the outside.  Might as well become instruments for good, praise, and the highest Love.  In the end, the music we send out vibrates back to us.

The Measure of Success

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Success sounds like a distant word for many, unattainable to others, as far as the stars, to most.  This is far from the truth.  Success is just a state of mind and appreciation.  It is what you think is happening in your life after you put effort and work into something. 

Maybe, when we think of success we think in terms of comparing ourselves to very successful people – millionaires, hollywood stars, best-selling authors, novel prize winners … and so on.  However, the true measure of success is very personal.  When we measure our success in terms of another person’s success, we are denying ourselves.  We are saying to ourselves that we don’t matter as much, that we must be like someone else to be happy, that our dreams can only be measured by the dreams of others – who have attained theirs.  We should see the success in others as fuel to propel our own, as mentors, as inspiration, not as a ruler or measure stick.

I have learned to celebrate my small successes and big ones all the same.  I have learned to appreciate every effort and its results, because learning to appreciate small and big success in our lives helps us attune ourselves to receive the fruits of our labor, the blessings, and all the great things to come.  When we learn to see and celebrate the good happenings in our lives, only growth can follow, and we are aligning ourselves for bigger and better things.

Slow Down to Synchronize

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Rose und Eis

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Maybe we have read about the importance of synchronicity in our lives, at some point.  There is much written on it, and many philosophies base some of their principles on it – the law of attraction …  However, sometimes we forget to realize that to be able to appreciate synchronicity in our lives, we must slow down the speed of our lives.  Simply put, when we are running through the path at high speeds, we fail to see the beautiful red rose hiding in the bushes, or the gorgeous butterfly atop the daisy.  We will miss the sweet aroma of the lavender field nearby … we can end up missing the best opportunities of our lives. 

I have been guilty of living at high speeds in the past, and I missed synchronicity at its best.  I had to crash, stop, look around, breathe, stand up, and start walking slow again; and I have to admit that I am happier now, and have been able to appreciate the blessings of learning to recognize synchronicity in my life.

I dare you to slow down and find those miracles working right now in your life.

The Candle of Love

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It is a new year and many of us have many resolutions and goals.  We celebrated the end of 2010 and the spark of receiving a new year brought hope of better things to come and new beginnings.  Once the New Year rolled in, we woke up to find out that the same routine was there.  The question is, “Did it bother you?”  “Did you feel uninspired, disappointed?”

Sometimes we take away the joy ourselves; we let the candle of Love diminish, dim, and we don’t breathe on it to keep it going.  This can be applied to any areas of our lives – work, friendships, marriage …  It is easy to fall into a routine and stop appreciating what we do, what we have … Many times there is nothing wrong with it, but we have stopped blowing the candle to sparkle its fire.

This year I set many goals, but one for sure is to continue blowing on my candle to make it sparkle just enough to appreciate my life under its light.

The Reason to Create

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Barnstar Creator

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Why do you create?  For whom do you create?  Approaching our craft with this question in mind can help focus our work.  It also helps set the mood for the day, even when you are not in your best mood.  It helps discern the goal – for what you work for or towards. 

When you approach your craft with Love, you are in for a great day at what you do best.  When you approach your craft with love for your Creator, then it makes all the difference.  You are gifting something to others and to your “God” or however you happen to call him/her/it.  Assuming this attitude will not only get you thru your daily task, it will improve it, make it better, because you are offering it to your Creator.

Next time you are about to paint, write, or do what you do best, answer this question.  The answer will set up the mood of the day.  If your answer is – for the agent or publisher, for the pesky boss … then maybe you should go back and reexamine your reasons.

If you don’t believe in a spiritual level, then the answer should be for you – for your contentment and happiness.

We all have to work to pay the bills, care for the family, and many other commitments; however, it is how we approach our craft that makes the difference.